It's the weekend again. Once again, my mood is low. I have been feeling melancholic for the past few days. He did meet me on 15th Feb as promised. He did like the pressie I gave him. We did have a talk about me moving to Sydney. He reckons that I will not be able to save and Perth would be a better place.


And I asked him the stupidest question: Do you think I should go to Syd?

I was hoping for the "right" answer but I just got the open-ended answer: It's up 2 u.

Right now, he is heading down south. I rather he not telling me where he is going. Next week school starts and it's going to be busy again. I am already starting to behave like a kuku. Luckily I have a very understanding friend who had late night coffee sessions and advised me that I got to learn to let go. I am crossing the line now with the feelings I have for him. I've always thought that I was cool enough to overcome these overwhelming affections.

Last night I was actually hoping that he can be with me all the time, made me wonder what am I expecting out of this relationship? I am leading myself to a point of deception and it's going nowhere. In all these confusion, I saw a conclusion. I need to move away and keep a clear mind. All these emotion ruling thoughts have clouded my judgements and decisions. Matter of fact, this is not a complicated situation from an outsider's point of view. I feel that way too, just that when I take into consideration my feelings into it, it becomes a tangled web.




Weather: Perfect summer day

Music: Make me pure - Robbie Williams

Mood: In denial